I love an underdog. I just do.
I love when the person that everyone else sells short proves everyone wrong. I love the journey of the hero. I love watching it all unfold in a movie, or a book, or, my favorite, in real life.
After all, nobody watches the story of the person who always has their life together, encounters no adversity, and gets everything they want and need all the time. A pristine story with no arc and no problems is not the one I want to hear or see.
I want to see the mess.
Life is messy.
So show me the mom who is sitting in the sandbox full of corn kernels at the pumpkin patch with a kid dumping corn down their diaper, who will later go on to find that corn in the bathtub, garage, and car seat for the next month.
Show me the sleep-deprived mom who has sunken eyes from consistently applying that nasal saline spray to her congested baby’s nose and watching him all night as he coughs and intermittently dozes. Whose life is a blur of changing diapers and feeding and reading the same story aloud 10 times.
Show me the mom who is sitting on the bathroom floor, enticing the toddler to pee on the potty after they’ve just urinated all over the tile. Who, while overwhelmed and frustrated, still tries to encourage the kid that the toilet is a good thing.
Show me the mom who is not composed when her teenager says something rude or snarky; who is vulnerable enough to show that child that their words matter and have hurt her feelings.
I want to see the mess.
I want to see the mess because it reminds me that in my own mess, there is an unspoken solidarity we share.
A sigh of relief that I’m not the only one.
A moment where whatever jealousy that lingers deep inside from the idea that other people have it more together than me vanishes.
Einstein said it best – “Before God, we are both equally wise – and equally foolish.”
In the search for the most authentic, real life I can live, I need my people to be messy.
Because I am, too.
And life is lived in the mess.
So when those holiday cards start arriving, and you see the perfectly posed family photos, please remember that behind the camera, and in real life, someone was probably frustrated with someone else or a kid was hangry.
And everyone’s clothes were itchy and uncomfortable.
