My Mother’s Abduction

My mother was abducted. Her mind was held hostage. Her captor slowly took possession of her brain, yet her body remained intact.

The villain is one that we all know. It is Alzheimer’s Disease.

September 21^st is World Alzheimer’s Day. This day is a global effort to raise awareness and eliminate the stigma surrounding Alzheimer’s Disease.

Typically, this day would have come and gone, and I probably wouldn’t have noticed. After recently losing my mom to Alzheimer’s, this day takes on a whole new meaning. Like most life events, we tend not to notice certain things until they affect us or our family.

However, I am asking you to continue to read this post even if you don’t have a loved one who suffers from this terrible disease.

Why?

Because the number of people who are diagnosed with Alzheimer’s is rising at an alarming rate, and it is something that we all should learn more about. If you don’t currently have a family member with this diagnosis, chances are, you will soon.

Here are some facts about Alzheimer’s Disease:

• As of 2023, over 6 million Americans are living with Alzheimer’s Disease.
• This number is expected to increase to 13-14 million by 2060.
• Women are twice as likely to develop Alzheimer’s Disease than men.
• African Americans and Hispanics are at a higher risk of developing Alzheimer’s.
• Most people who develop Alzheimer’s are over the age of 65.
• There is currently no cure.

Why are so many people being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s?

I have researched this topic a lot over the last year. Most health experts say it is due to the population living longer than ever before. While I believe this to be true, there must be something else. Is it an environmental factor? Or maybe something in our diet? I think both could be contributing factors. We need more research to know for sure.

A Healthy Life

Here is what I do know: my mother was a health nut. She ate healthy, took fantastic care of herself, and exercised daily. She didn’t drink or smoke. Keeping her brain “busy” was something she loved to do. Reading books and doing puzzles were some of her favorite pastimes. Of all the people I know, she was the absolute last one that I thought would get this horrible disease. Yet she did.

Living With Alzheimer’s

Her story is probably very similar to a lot of other Alzheimer’s patients out there. She hid it from us for a very long time (with the help of my father). The signs were extremely subtle at first. She slowly quit talking to us on the phone. She would relay messages to us through my Dad, saying she was too busy to talk. When having a conversation in person, she would often whisper questions in my Dad’s ear to try and keep up. She became very scared of being left alone. In fact, she refused to be left alone. She explained this by saying she couldn’t see well.

Looking back, I can’t believe that we missed these signs. But, you believe what your loved ones tell you. If I am being honest, I also didn’t want to admit to myself that something could be wrong with my mom.

The Decline

After the death of my father, my mother’s condition declined rapidly. Her anxiety was through the roof. She had lost all her short-term memory. Only her long-term memory remained.

She started falling—a lot.

She would forget to eat and drink, and her moods were drastic. You never knew what version of her you would get when you visited. Would she scream and yell out of frustration, or would she gently squeeze my hand and smile her sweet smile?

It was almost like she was dying a little every single day. The mom that I once knew was disappearing right before my eyes. To make matters worse, there was absolutely nothing that I could do about it.

Caregiver’s Struggle Too

I have never felt so helpless as I did in those moments. Knowing that my mother was suffering and I couldn’t help her was devastating.

Drawing strength from friends who were going through similar seasons with their loved ones has definitely helped me through this journey. Prayer, meditation and yoga became my daily practices for coping. I read every book I could get my hands on to help me better understand what Mom was going through.

All of these things were helpful, but it was still a daily struggle.

My mother was 75 when she passed away. She was young. I always thought she would live well into her 80s. It is difficult not to be angry at this disease for taking her so early. I struggle with that daily, too.

You Are Enough

Mom always said that your struggles in life often lead to your purpose. I am not sure what this means for me. But I do hope that sharing our story may help someone walking down this road.

If you are a caretaker for someone with Alzheimer’s, please know that you are enough. They don’t need you to do anything other than love them, visit with them, and hold their hand.

My mother was a fierce, determined lady. I was holding her hand when she passed. I like to think that some of her determination was passed on to me at that moment.

So, Alzheimer’s Disease, look out.

I will spend the rest of my days creating awareness and supporting Alzheimer’s research until there is a cure.