There has been much discussion about sending the little ones off to school, but how about those mommas who are sending their babies off to college?!
Let’s hear it for the mommas in the back – the ones who have spent 17+ years getting their little ones ready for ADULTHOOD.
I have spent 30 years welcoming those “babies” to college campuses in Louisiana, Texas, and now Florida. The feeling of youth is evident on a university campus. Each fall, I feel like I am 18 years old again….and again….and again. Being young and carefree is wonderful, but going off to college does come with some responsibility.
A crash course in which your babies take responsibility in their journey to adulthood may be necessary.
Add in a few tips for success, and bam! You have an adult.
Here are a few things to help you help your college-bound child during this new journey.
Academic Success Tips
Academic success starts with organization. Putting all assignments, deadlines, and due dates in a planner for the first few weeks of college sets the tone for the semester. I love Emily Ley’s Simplified Planner products, or for an electronic planner, use Google calendar. Even if they have never used a planner before, it is not too late to help them effectively organize their day using a paper or electronic calendar.
If you attended a parent orientation, you probably heard about the college’s tutoring services or the Academic Success Center. During the first few weeks of class, have your college student run (not walk!) to sign up for tutoring in the subject(s) they struggled with in high school. Students who have attended the university for a few semesters are great resources for classes that may require some tutoring help. They may think it is too early in the semester to get tutoring – wrong! When you need help mid-semester, all the appointments will be taken by the students who signed up early.
Help your college student pick one thing to get involved in. Student Life/Activities offices work hard to program activities to engage the student body. Social distancing has rocked the college involvement team at universities these past few years, but things are finally returning to normal.
Adulting Without Your Momma
Can your college student make a doctor’s appointment? Do you know a doctor in their new college town/city? Universities have health clinics that provide triage-type services with easy access. At some point, your young adult may need to see a doctor outside that clinic.
TIP: Add an entry to their phone contacts as “Insurance.” Put information about the medical policy they are under in that entry. Then have a lesson is making a doctor’s appointment. You can also take a picture of the card and put it in the picture folder on their phone. Most importantly, make sure their phone is secure.
Is your college student knowledgeable about basic over-the-counter (OTC) medicines and how to read the label for dosage? A student in one of the freshman success courses I taught came to my office requesting to talk to me, and I was ready for an engaging conversation on something I taught in class. Nope – he needed help deciding what OTC medication he required. I walked him over to the campus store and reviewed a few things. Then he asked me, “how much do I take?” I changed my teaching topic during the next class to “essential adulting issues.”
Campus dining services have changed for the better! So many choices and options at their fingertips. Have them download the Tapandgo app so they can order food that is ready in between classes or when they are in a hurry.
The next tip – teach them how to do laundry…and then send them to my house! I hate laundry, so I refuse to go into detail, but you get my drift. And please do not tell your college boys that a way to meet college girls is to get them to show you how to do laundry. College girls don’t know either!
Here are a few suggestions on how NOT to look like a first-year college student: (1) Have your college student take a picture of their schedule and set that as the screen saver; (2) preserve their high school letterman’s jacket or graduation gear. This way, they can’t take those items to college; (3) encourage them not to come home every weekend (Sorry, mommas!). Suggest they hang out on campus instead.
Campus Safety Tips
My resident expert gave me first-hand tips on being safe on a college campus. My husband, Marc, has 35 years in law enforcement on a college campus. He offers the following suggestions and encourages mommas to go over these with their college students.
Most universities have the Guardian App. This app is like your own personal emergency phone, where a college student can upload allergies, class schedules, and other personal information. If the student presses a specific button, the police department will get the exact GPS coordinates and the information the student uploaded. This is especially helpful if the student is frequently traveling. A student should never put their date of birth, driver’s license number, or social security number in the app.
All universities have an alert system. Students need to sign up for campus alerts. The student may enter multiple parent phone numbers so that the parent will receive the alerts, which vary in type from active shooter alerts to weather information.
Universities like the University of West Florida Police Department have the Rape Aggression Defense (RAD) training program. Marc highly encourages all female students to take this class that focuses on getting out of situations or how to fight to get out of a situation. For more campus safety tips, click here.
One Last Nugget of Advice…
Mommas help your college kids gain independence by encouraging them to set up video chats, face time, or zoom visits with their family. Doing this will allow the student and those at home to stay connected and share experiences. Hopefully, this will limit the number of daily calls and text messages. Understandably, during the beginning of the semester, there will be an unusually high number of texts and calls. The road to independence needs to provide the student with opportunities for their own decision-making.
Now let’s see that first day of college picture!